Grumpy

Okay, so maybe grumpy is saying it soft - I'm just plain pissed off. I'm not really sure at what exactly, it just seems to be a lot of little things all at once. Like having to haul all of the groceries in the house by myself yet again after fighting a mob of people at the store. Then finding that my mom & dad's puppy that we're watching had pooped in the guest room because DH didn't close the door. Then finding it still there after I loudly pointed it out and went to use the bathroom myself. Seeing the earliest twinges of spotting when I went to the bathroom. DH shrugging off actually doing anything for NYE (not that I was really that into it but I'm sick of being the one to make all the plans and then having him just sit there like a bump on a log). And then the neighbors started in with the damn fireworks - AGAIN. Oh yes, then I remembered this was the NYE we were supposed to be in NYC celebrating DH's graduation and RN license. Joy.

Maybe I'll be in a better mood tomorrow. I'm pretty sure this is just AF talking because I'm like seriously angry at a whole lot of nothing. But it still didn't stop me from picking up the phone and calling the cops on my pyro happy neighbors. I mean, I get July 4th and even NYE but seriously, when did Halloween become a fireworks worthy holiday? I guess I'd just rather not get my house burned down by some drunken idiots setting off professional sized fireworks in a heavily populated residential area, KWIM?

Blah and screw 2009 anyway.

Add another one to the list

Last night on Facebook I came across an old friend of ours that we have not seen or heard from in 6 1/2 years. She was a friend of DH's before he and I met and actually is part of the chain that let to us meeting. J is the mother of my high school boyfriend's daughter but they haven't been together since about the time she was born 10 years ago. She introduced DH and the ex BF so DH could rent a room from the ex and ex could make his child support payments. Following so far? So when I moved back in with my parents 8 years ago, ex caught wind of it and called me trying to rekindle things. I called back, trying to very nicely tell him I was not interested and DH answered the phone (roomies, remember?) and as he was passing the phone to ex, made the comment I sounded cute. Ex said "Hello?" and I said "What did he just say?" Ex started laughing and handed the phone back to DH. We talked for 45 minutes, he asked if I wanted to catch a movie and we've been together ever since (much to the dismay of ex).

Okay, back to our friend J. She had just gotten engaged to someone else, M, when I met DH and was getting married the following year. DH proposed 9ish months later and we set a date for 3 months after J & M were getting married. She and I ended up bonding over wedding plans and hating on the ex BF (really rather funny and made ex completely crazy).

So today she confirms my friend request and sent me a bubbly note about how she's in the last weeks of her pregnancy and this time next month she'll be holding her beautiful twin girls. Looking over the rest of her profile, these will be children 4 and 5 for her. And what could I say? I told her where we're living, where I work, and what DH is doing in school. "No kids yet, but hopefully soon!" Right.

Great, so that makes FOUR people I know due in the next 3 weeks. Fantastic. This whole waiting for my turn thing is wearing my patience thin. I realize we haven't been actively trying in the last few months but I guess that's kind of part of the process when it goes on this long, don't you think? I figure that we;ve got another full cycle until we get DH's s/a results back then we'll give the Clomid a shot and go from there. The longing for a baby is still there, it just hurts too much to put the effort in without results any more.

One moment please!

Please pardon the crappy look of my blog for a bit. I'm trying to learn how to format my blog with all those pretty backgrounds everyone else seems to have and well, I'm having issues that I don't have time to fix right now.

Pssst...would it be really bad to admit that I actually use to be able to write HTML in high school? Ugh.

Oh how the time flies!

I know I've been an absent blogger lately. Life's just been busy I suppose. I've been sick for most of the last week which sucks but at least it happened after Thanksgiving. My brother and his family were up from Florida including my 17 month old nephew. I know a lot of women have talked about how hard it was to see other family member's children and pregnant bellies. For some reason I was fine with it. I loved sitting on the floor playing with him, seeing how quickly he learns things now, and especially when he picked my lap to crawl in when he was sleepy. My brother and I talked the night before they flew up and he was telling me how my SIL is not one of those women who adores being pregnant. Don't get me wrong, she loves being a mother and is pretty darn good at it too but the actual pregnancy thing is not her gig. I finally ended up telling him that DH and I have been trying for over a year. SIL has gotten pregnant twice on the pill now and while I know pregnancy isn't an easy thing, maybe it's harder to appreciate when it's come so easily to her. My brother was incredibly understanding and supportive and maybe that's part of what makes it easier not to begrudge them for their super fertility.

Even though I'm not feeling great I did drag our Christmas tree upstairs last night. I work a lot this month and I guess I figured if I didn't get it up soon, it wouldn't get put up at all. Plus I figured that it would spur me into dragging everything else out too. So I unzip the tree bag and the first thing I see is a stocking. A light green and white classic Pooh stocking I had bought on clearance at the end of the season last year. I figured it would work for a boy or a girl and still being relatively new to TTC, I was sure we'd have a baby by this time or at the very least be pregnant. Ha!

I do have some news on that front though. DH had his follow up with the urologist. The WBCs are gone which is awesome! So now we're scheduling the back to back s/a and we'll go from there. And even though AF dropped by yesterday, it was the first time ever that I've had a "perfect" 28 day cycle! Even though I haven't been tracking at all, I was pretty sure I Oed earlier this month and it looks like I was right. I attribute it to recent weight loss (11.6 pounds as of Tuesday) and exercising more. I think we're going to let nature take it's course for the next few months still before getting back to really trying. I'd really like to lose another 20 lbs or so even though I know I have a lot more than that to ultimately lose but I really don't feel like taking a whole year off to do it. DH has decided he really does want to finish his RN and there is a chance he could start another program this summer and be done spring 2011.

I guess that's it for now....I'll try to be around more! :o)